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Vincent Margera, known to fans of the MTV reality show Viva La Bam as “Don Vito,” was convicted Wednesday of two counts of sexual assault on a child and could face life in prison. The obese, often sweaty, often tormented uncle of prankster Bam Margera reportedly collapsed in court as his conviction was read and screamed, “Just kill me now.” Witnesses also claimed he yelled to the court, “You can all go rot in fucking hell.” As the story goes, Don Vito made an appearance at the Colorado Mills Mall in Lakewood, Colorado in August of last year and scores of Viva fans showed up to meet the 51-year-old reality star. According to a San Francisco Chronicle article last week, Vito showed up so unbelievably drunk to the event that he not only groped the tits and ass of two 12-year-old girls and one 14-year-old girl, but he also pissed his pants. The prosecutor in Vito’s trial described Margera’s behavior as “out of control.” During the trial, Vito’s sister-in-law April Margera testified that she had never seen him grope young girls before. Prosecutors promptly impugned April’s testimony when they showed the court multiple photographs of Vito groping and kissing girls’ breasts. On Thursday, MTV published an article claiming Don Vito is on suicide watch in a Colorado jail where he will be held until his December 20 sentencing. As a fan of Viva La Bam, it’s sad to find out that Don Vito is actually the crass, bumbling bum that he appears to be on TV. My favorite Vito moment is when Bam’s gang dug a 30-foot tunnel that led to the floor of Vito’s bedroom. As they popped through the carpet, Vito goes in his thick Philly accent, “Whata you, retarded or something?” Perhaps someone needs to ask that same question to Vito.